Athothis : a satire on modern medicine / by Thomas C. Minor.

to convert water into wine ; his last advice to his disci- ples to drink to his memory. As for St. Paul, he advised Timothy, ' Drink no longer water, but a little wine for the stomach's sake/ Methinks I should have attended this good saint's church were he preaching at the present day." ••Such serious subjects do not admit of jocularity," remarked Athothis, reprovingly. " Nevertheless, I am forced to confess that the habit of drink is increased or diminished by the religious beliefs of mortals. Thus Christian nations, following the teachings of their leaders, seem the most addicted to intemperance."' " Cynicism is unbecoming an immortal of the first dynasty!" answered Paulus Androcydes, scornfully. " This appetite for drink is, according to my notion, a natural instinct, inherited by many kinds of animals, birds, and insects, as well as mankind. I have seen flies intoxicated on the sugar in whisky toddy, and pigs drunk from cherries steeped in liquor. I have known monkeys, goats, and parrots to be exceedingly fond of wine ; horses that could drink gallons of beer, and cows that doted on the swill from alcohol distilleries." '•And the milk of such cows will poison children who drink it." retorted Athothis. "And allow me to assure you that the babes of the first dynasty did not die from the poisoned lacteal secretions of swill-fed cattle." "It has been claimed," continued Paulus Androcydes, " that races of savages have been decimated by drunken- ness when forced in contact with Christian peoples. I make this remark, lest you insist that mere instinct is not akin to human reason. But these wild tribes of men in Africa, Asia, and America had their intoxicating drinks long before they ever heard of Christianity. That