Athothis : a satire on modern medicine / by Thomas C. Minor.

not that of his fashionable physician. Doctor Beau- monde has numerous clients of this class to visit, and is very happy, basking in the sunshine of Fortune." " You are using your spiritual vision expertly," re- marked Athothis, approvingly. " But here comes another stylish medical vehicle, with coachman and livery. I observe that its occupant is a severe, drowsy-looking individual, who is either deeply buried in meditation or half asleep. He must have acquired his professional poise by hard study and many rehearsals in front of a glass. He wishes to appear learned and weary at the same time, so that the admiring public may say : ' Look at the wise old doctor; he has broken down his health from overwork and devotion to suffering humanity. Ah! he needs our support and sympathy.'" " You have read him correctly," said Paulus Andro- cydes; for that is the eminent Doctor Toiler, one of the professors in the Medical College of Utopia. Toiler has an enormous practice ; and every afternoon, from two to five, prescribes for patients by the score. He is a formualist, and uses but four remedies; i. e., castor oil, calomel, morphine, and quinine. He has no time to write out formulae in full, and so numbers them recipes 1, 2, 3, 4. This enables the pharmacist, as he needs but few medicines, to buy his stock at wholesale; no mis- takes are made in compounding, and the druggist has grown wealthy. Happy the apothecary who hath such a patron! " Toiler's business is principally among old and young married women. He is the medical high priest to whom most fashionable wives have confessed the shortcomings of husbands, the misfortunes of sons, the conjugal infe- licity of daughters. His bosom is a closet wherein are